Thursday, May 22, 2008

The Strategizing Begins...All Hail the Madonna Army. (of two)

Just a little peek into the madness that follows an announcement of a Madonna tour. A PEEK, because for non-Madonna "I only like her old stuff" fans, getting more than a peek is like looking directly into the sun. Our obsession will burn your retinas out.

This morning Joey forwards me an email from ICON (Madonna's fan club....go ahead...laugh it up) announcing an additional tour date is in NY and that presale tickets for fan club members go up for sale today at 10am

Me: okay, this is for ny right? i think the presales for l.a. and san diego go on sale next week, the 27th I'm a legacy member too.
(*again, I can hear you laughing but FYI...Icon legacy members like myself get presales at 10 am and other measly non legacy members get it at noon. SO there, BOOYAH! ......... I know...I'm sad.)
i don't know...should i buy or just say screw it, buy at the door....last time i had to sell my ticket for less than I bought it for! OR score a really good ticket from the presales and sell on ebay!!! hmmm...

Joey: In my humble opinion, these presales are all just a carnival funhouse with fog and mirrors for our amusement. As such, I think we should have fun and try as hard as we can; you try for a pair from Icon at 10 and I will try the Citicard at noon. If we manage to get tickets in the first 10 rows, just buy them. If they are in the first three rows, we'll keep them and relax until November, but if they're past that point we will sell them on Stubhub for a small fortune and pay for our tickets at the door.

It's important that we don't forget that our priority is not just getting a ticket, because we both know now that any asshole can manage that. We have to get THE tickets that we want. Frankly, I've never come across a ticket online that was any better than the least of what was offered us at the venue, so why bother paying the fees? Further, I like the excitement of the hunt on that day; it was fun as hell showing up and going for it. Unless you can guaruntee I will be utterly happy up front, I prefer to surrender to destiny.

Me: agree agree agree on everything. first ten rows are a keeper, past third row, sell sell sell!
okay. got it.

now here's the question...catwalk or no catwalk? there's been conflicting reports on the madonna message board. if there IS a cat walk - it looks to be better than the catwalk for confessions because it extends to a T at the end of the catwalk. If there's no catwalk, then it truly is war.
i'm wearing camo. ;p

Joey: I HATE CONFLICTING REPORTS!!!!! If those Europeans are not lying to us, the T may be our Everest. Hopefully they will have a good seating chart the day of. If there is a T, then we are just going to have to use The Force to make a good judgement. Oooooooo, uncertainty!

Me: I know I know....I don't want to ruin the concert by going on that damn board but it looks like I'm going to have to take a peek just to see the stage set up.
we're getting front row dammit.

Joey:(with two concert venue set ups from Petco Park attached to email)

Non- Madonna stage:

Madonna Stage:

Now girl look, see these two charts I've attached. The regular one is three sections AB&C. The Madonna one is two sections, but only 16 seats in each row. It's say that is clear cut proof of the existence of THE T. We are all about the T. So really, if you get tickets anywhere on the T (15 or 16 on one side or 1 and 2 on the other, I guess we will be set. Still the madjic happens on the main stage, so I will still try, unless I can get the first row at the end of the T. Oh, dear god, the complications. The vapors, dahling, the vapors, sweetie.

Me: Oh we looovveee the T, we love the T! of course, we aim high and we want front front row, main stage. But still... we love the T. oh and next time we shall double check with the box office...remember at Staples when that bitch SAID we would be by the end stage and instead we were 15 rows behind it??? I so wanted to walk up to that bastard and slap him until my money came back.

Joey: I need to see a map with the actual row and seat numbers, like the Forum had. I'll never trust those minimum wage Staples employees as long as I live!!!! It was pretty fun pretending we were sitting where we wanted to until the lights went down. Memories, sweetie.

Me: aaah memories of our mild anxiety attacks while we tried to be sneaky.... lessons learned dahling.

Joey: And those fabulous drunk bitches and their two hour search for their purse....... Classic times, dahling.

Me: HAHAHA! ogod I forgot about that... what about the unexpected pot smokers next to us who thought they were at a led zep concert?! Misty water colored memories...

Joey:....of the waaaaay we were.....

Yeah yeah, sorry if this bored you to tears but we get way too excited about this shit. It keeps us young :D


Shannon Bieger said...

Hmm.....have you considered applying for a job in Homeland Security? You guys are like battlefield geniuses.

Franki said...

And I was thinking you should turn your eyes towards finding the cure for cancer.

You are a hot mess!

Tug said...

You 2 totally crack me up - does he have a brother? I don't NEED sex, I just really need some funny. ;-)

Kim said...

You guys are incredible. :)