Saturday, February 17, 2007
Houston, We Have A Problem......
I was going to do an emergency Fan Letter Saturday.
But really this is SO not funny anymore. This is truly like watching a car crash in slow motion. What I'm wondering is...where are her friends? family? shit...where's her publicist or at least the people who depend on her to make money?? Don't they watch their product? Obviously this girl is coo coo for cocoa puffs..and giving the world a front row seat as her downward spiral gains momentum from her new aerodynamic globe of a head. Last I checked, hitting rock bottom (shaving her head and getting two tattoos) can be done AT HOME. Have the assistant run down to Wal-Mart to grab you some cheetohs and and hair clippers, call a few peeps to get a tattoo artist to pay you a visit and put on "Bad Day" in a continuous loop on your Ipod and go crazy....literally. Why go walking around in public making sure the paparazzi has documented your demise?
I was about to feel sorry for her, but you know what? Bitch needs to stay home with her TWO kids. One of which is an INFANT. You had a good run, made some money, now go HOME. Those poor kids didn't ask for this crap....but I guess to do that, you'd have to think about someone besides yourself and I don't think she does that much.
Someone PLEASE take her kids. Can someone get Mia Farrow on the line? She's still in the adopting scene right? How about Angelina? Does she adopt Caucasian kids? Hell..I'll even take Kevin Federline at this point! Or hey, drop them off at my house or something...the worst that could happen is that little Sean Preston might know the whole routine from "Vogue," by the time he leaves my house, which could pose for some serious middle school ass whoopin'...(not that he would avoid the ass whoopin' anyway considering who his parents are.)
Okay. I'm done. Let's hope someone shoots her with a tranquilizer gun soon and wraps her up in a nice, cozy white shirt with reaaaallly long sleeves...with cute little buckles in the back........