You ever have one of those weeks where your pizza falls on floor cheese side down? you explode in the toilet and there's one square of toilet paper left? your hair looks like Joyce Dewitt's? the laundry starts reproducing more laundry and the dirty dishes thought it was a good idea and did the same? the sound of others BREATHING in your direction makes you want to kick them squaw in the arse? your bank balance is negative a couple thousand dollars and top ramen is starting to look like a gourmet meal? each cup of coffee you have is either too sweet, too bitter, or has already gotten cold? when friends seem a world away and annoying motherfuckers are within choking distance? when your obvious genius isn't appreciated in your own time?(heh),when there's ham, no burger? Peanut butter no jelly? Your mind and body feels like it got a good ol' Ike Turner beat down? When everyone else seems like they got their shit together except YOU? when the pen runs out of ink in the middle of writing a check? where a "power nap" just won't cut it and what you really need is a "power week" of sleep? when all your hard earned money seems to go to everyone else but YOU? your blog looks funny on Internet Explorer but yet looks fine on Mozilla Firefox and you're not computer competent enough to fix it? the rug seems to have pores that actually produces dirt and lint? you feel you've been vacuuming said rug so much that if you totaled up the miles you've vacummed, it would circle the earth EIGHT TIMES? prozac starts sounding pretty darn good, downed with a shot of tequila coupled with a lobotomy? the person who gave you a bad first impression makes an even WORSE second impression? everyone thinks "whorebag" is a malicious word? (its actually a loving term people.. a whorebag coupled with some PMS pants and bitchy heels makes for a great ensemble), when you want a piece of chocolate cake and there's only sugar free crap in the cupboard? then you realize it was your dumbass that bought the sugar free crap? you're finally SO SO happy that it's Friday and then you realize you're a mom and moms don't really get a REAL "friday?"
That's the kind of week I had. Love me.
Now cheer me up and leave a dirty joke in my comments section!