Wednesday, July 02, 2008

VIVA Galletas Con Malvavisco !!!!!! Just keep reading...

Just to let you know that this blog post was about 50 jillion things before I deleted it and started over. First, I was going to tell you how very sore I was from working the corner. (I KID! I KID! I would only be a sign holder if it didn't require me to work on weekends......What job were YOU thinking about Pervy McHumperson!?). No really, I'm sore from my new workout (p90x, good workout, but the teacher is pompous ass) but really, who wants another post about my inconsistent workouts? Bah. Delete.

Then I was going to tell you about the munchkin's pre-k graduation last week and how we just can't seem to vibe with most of the parents at my school. I was going to go on and on about the sea of dads who wore khakis and crocs, (plastic shoes on adults, not a good look.) the moms in their pretty dresses, perfectly coiffed hair and home baked goods. Then there was us: Dad in board shorts, flip flops, a tank and a sleeve tattoo, Mom in camo cargo pants, holding cupcakes she picked up at the local bakery and the hair, which, although combed, did not involve a curling iron, any hair products and had about 3 inches of roots showing, (holla!).
But then I got bored of that subject and deleted it. I'd rather just post a picture of pure cuteness in a homemade graduation hat holding a fake diploma:

This chick is fierce. Please recognize.

THEN I was going to write about this magical cookie made by our fine friends in Mexico. It's galletas con malvavisco or in Britney honky speak: A marshmallow cookie ya'll!!

Isn't it pretty? Four little marshmallows that sit elegantly on top of a short bread type biscuit with delicate artificially colored coconut sprinkles all over it. Delicious. This new treat is giving my favorite inappropriately named candy, Circus Peanuts, a run for its money. But midway through writing about this precious delectable jewel, I got hungry, grabbed a few and completely lost my train of thought. Then I got mad at it because those two cookies added another 20 minutes to my workout. But I won't be mad at it for long. How could you? Look at it! Soooo pretty.

THEN I was going to get all sappy ass on yo ass and talk about my upcoming 10 year wedding anniversary with viking hubby this July 4th and like omg, I can't believe we've been married so long!! Tell you how marriage takes work, and bombard you with cliche' after cliche' about patience, growing,communication, and understanding each others feelings...but I accidentally barfed on myself because my body isn't used to all that Lifetime Network bullshit. The basic rule of thumb in marriage and in life is: Don't be an asshole. You can have your moments of asshole-ness but as a whole, you shouldn't marry an asshole (this requires more than a couple months of dating, after all that humpy fucky honeymoon times have been worked out of your system and you can really see them for what they are...asshole or non-asshole) , or act like an asshole and then expect to be treated like a king/queen in return. Add a dash of laughing and sex in the mix and quite possibly it could work out. But then I'm like, okay who am I to be preaching about marriage? I mean, 10 years is long sure, but that doesn't make me an expert for chrissakes! Just wish us luck in our next 10 years okay?

Our classic wedding picture. Or should I say CLASSY wedding picture? We put the ASSY in Classy baby.

So I give up.
Have a happy hump day and enjoy the humpable pictures below:

David Beckham...mmmmm. Too bad he sounds like the missing member of Alvin and the Chipmunks.

She just got done sketching my ass and had to stop and daydream about me a bit. I love you too Angie!

Gotta love old skool Marky Mark holding his funky bunches.

Megan Fox: Angelina Lite....with stupider tattoos.

And finally, unbutton your shirt and air out your skirts, because here's the hottest betch of all time!!!

Sizzzzlinggg!! No really? Is he on fire? I don't think people are suppose to be that red.


Anonymous said...

Happy Anniversary!! The main thing in a successful marriage is to laugh...and don't forget to have lots of sex too.

Tug said...

Aw, congrats to the cutest little munchkin of all!! 10 years? Wow. I've been divorced for 23...LOL. Cheers to another 10!

WTF did happen to Carrot Top? He was never all that, but seriously, ew.

Lizzle said...

Ok, seriously, I've warned you before not to tempt me with pictures of your husband and child, lest I decide to bump you off and steal your family!

I love me some old skool marky mark and his funky bunch... I don't care how funky it is, it's nothing that a little soap, water, and lots of TLC can't fix!

Immoral Matriarch said...

What the hell happened to Carrot Top?

Franki said...

We gots the same taste lady. And Carrot Top must be an alien.

And dat baby girl is adorable.