Turkey, Mashed Potatoes and a heaping helping of beantown boys!

That picture is just some image I pulled up on google, but basically it's me about 15 or so years ago. Minus the Peggy Hill hair, and those mini-dildos she's holding...(what are those????)
OH and wtf with the Michael Jackson posters? Replace those with Michael J. Fox posters and then we'd really be in business.

Anyywaysss.....that picture took longer to explain that I wanted.

A long long time ago, my little midget ass got bamboozled by five boys from bean town. I was one of the many tween minions who would go to Spencer's Gifts at the mall and clean them the fuck out of NKOTB buttons that were the size of plates. And god forbid if another girl was there trying to hoard all the Donnie buttons because she would get the back of her head clubbed by a 4'8 hormonal tyrant. (ahem). And yes, I'll give you a moment to chuckle at the fact that I'm the exact same height now as I was in sixth grade.

You all right now? Have you wiped off your tears of hilarity? Okay, moving right along.

NKOTB represent the days where the only worry I had in my little head was if I could get my mom and dad to buy me a Big Bopper AND a Tiger Beat magazine the next time we went to Vons. My daddy even got me tickets to their Magic Summer concert, (thanks Daddy!) although my seat was so far up they appeared to be the same size as they were on my button. Regardless, I never forgot that day and I never thought in my wildest dreams that I would EVER go to a New Kids On The Block concert EVER EVER again. Especially in my thirties (EARLY thirties....emphasis on EARLY). So imagine my utter glee when they announced a comeback. I thought I was going to be the only jack ass excited over this, but judging from their recent success, I'm not the only jack ass holding on to their t-shirts and buttons.....and a flag, and some comic books, and a hardcover coffee table book, and ...well you get the picture, if not a clear visual of why my garage is cluttered.

So this past week, I was reunited with my boyfriends again and I had a fellow NKOTB jackass with me! (Hi Jenessa!). We got there with no tickets and were informed within a couple minutes of getting to the Nokia theater that they were sold out but there was a 'small chance' they might sell some leftover crap tickets later. Long story short, they did offer crap tickets...we said no and waited. (I have Madonna concert experience remember?)...they offered us less crappy tickets... we said no...and waited, and waited...until...

"Hey girls, would you like two tickets in the fifth row at the pit?"


SOLD!!!!! And for a night, two stay at home moms were 12 years old again....

Here's our magical night with our long lost boyfriends!

Mrs. Donnie Wahlberg......Mrs. Wahlberg....Mrs. Midget Wahlberg.......Mrs. Midget Hypen Wahlberg and other stuff I used to write in my Trapper Keeper

Well you guys I did it. I sent it, it's out there for the Queen and if you don't know what I'm talking about, click here. So keep the good vibes coming.

I am not posting the video that I made just because I'm a little superstitious and I want to keep it between me and Mrs. Ritchie for now. I'll post it up eventually.

Meanwhile, yesterday I saw NKOTB's new video for Summertime. Now before I go into this, a long time ago, David Cassidy made a comeback in the 90's. I remember watching these "old" ladies scream (ahem..by old I mean my age now..) and practically cream their granny panties for David Cassidy. I was like, What the f? really? David Cassidy? Why? And jeesh lady, quit acting like a teenager and put that Tiger Beat magazine away!

But ooooh lookee lookee here....look what "old" lady is now planning on going to the concert with her friends (and YES I will wear my NKOTB shirt from Spencers because I may be old but I still fit into that bad boy!) and giggling like a hormone fueled teenager after seeing this:



I know, I know. They're not "to die for" gorgeous, and yet still, I can't help but want to throw my panties at Donnie's chicken chest. (Side note: um Danny's got the best bod out of the bunch and yet somehow remained covered. Donnie may have lost some of his hair but I still love that arrogant bastard.) Jon was strugglin' on those steps poor guy, he was never my favorite back in the day but I must say he has aged well. I used to think his upper lip looked like it used to be a cleft lip. A post-op cleft lip? Does that even make sense? Like he had a cleft lip before and now.....you know what? don't pay attention to me, I don't know what I'm talking about.
Joey looks great - which is to be expected being the youngest "kid", and Jordan....well, with Jordan, I still can't help but think he might be playing for Tommy girl's team. Did you see how he looked at those girls in the video? Two words: Not Interested. You know Jordan was thinking, "If only you had a peter I could piper...." He's cute though, don't get me wrong, he just never struck me as a sexual guy....with the ladies.....but I bet he's a freak if you put him in some heels and fish net pantyhose. He'd put Oscar De La Hoya to shame.
But Donnie...oh Donnie...how I loved and still love his obnoxious ass. (up until I saw Mark Wahlberg w/out his shirt and then he kind of took a backseat for a couple years).

So to the dear sweet ladies that I called "old" that were screaming for David Cassidy on the Today show those many years ago. I'm sorry. I understand. And you can bet I'll be at the concert screaming like a jack ass when they sing "Tonight" and "Please Don't Go Girl."
Now if you'll excuse me I have to go to the garage and dig up my NKOTB buttons, shirt, coffee table book (hard cover 1st edition!) and I heart Donnie scrapbook I made in 7th grade and relive the days of no bills and Trapper Keepers.